Satsangam

Satsangam-  company with an assembly of persons who listen to, talk about, and assimilate the truth

Today an old memory came back to me of a morning about sixteen years ago.  I was sitting at a coffee shop and writing the letters NOW on the webbing between my thumb and index finger.  Someone came up and smirked, asking, “Is that for the National Organization of Women?” And I felt a little embarrassed; not sure how to explain the simplicity of it.  That it didn’t mean more than exactly what it appeared to be.  That I was performing some sort of tiny ritual to hold on to that exact moment of being.

My path was muddy and indistinct back then, but I had started down it.  Fortunate to have books and a few good people to propel the work of finding clarity, but left to piece it together on my own.

Within just the past few years; through my practice at the local yoga studio, and now as a teacher;  like minded people have started flooding into my life.  People who are carving out the same thing I am.  Who conveniently don’t need the explanation I so struggle to formulate.

It’s been so different…  Feeling connected; that it was hard to accept at first.  I lacked the courage to fully step in.  But the whole-hearted generosity of these folks continued on and on.  Generosity in every way, but most importantly in the trust they gave to me.  I felt it when they told me just how they were really doing, when I asked  while taking off my shoes for practice.  I received it when they stopped fidgeting with their phone to make full eye contact.  I received it when they gave me tips on my handstand, and when they asked me for advice as well.  A grand openness and softening.  Sweetly beating my reticence over the head.

Finally; I overcame my apprehension.  And an old repressive wall inside me came undone.

I’ve put both feet in.

I’m drinking the juice.

Loving and loved, and letting this tide take me with it.

I needed something big to do it, and something big came and persistent did.

These are my people.  This is my satsang.

It’s my hope that all beings may find this blessing.

Image

About these ads

One thought on “Satsangam

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s